When I was pregnant with Florence I read every parenting book I could get my hands on. It was my inner control freak’s way of preparing for all of possible things that could be thrown at me in those early days as a Mama and while I took a little bit of value from each of them, only one of them talked about what I could expect from myself and not just from my baby. I was very lucky after having Florence that everything was pretty plain sailing. I’d had a straightforward birth with no stitches needed, and I was up and about pain free three days post partum. The baby blues never came and we quickly fell into a steady routine as a new family of three. Added to that the fact that Florence was a textbook, easy baby and it’s safe to say I felt very very fortunate to find those early weeks with a newborn a bit of a breeze.

However, I have to admit, had I been less confident or had Florence not been quite so ‘text book’ I fear my post natal experience would have been a bit of a struggle. I was missed off of the list of any postpartum care and had to chase up the midwife and health visitors on more than one occasion for the standard appointments, which aside from one, ended up making me feel pretty rubbish.

Had I had midwives and a post natal team like the two women who wrote the book I’m about to tell you about, I’d have had an even better experience. The Little Book of Self Care for New Mums by Beccy Hands & Alexis Stickland is an ultimate guide to what you can expect from your own mind and body once you’ve had your little one. Split into three main sections the two midwife-turned-authors discuss everything from vaginal tears and pelvic floors to nourishing your body and dealing with the baby blues in a no holds barred way. With nothing left unsaid and all of those questions you might be embarrassed to ask, Beccy and Alexis have written in such a way that makes you feel like you’re sitting chatting to your best mate rather than reading a ‘self help book’.

I particularly like the way that both women share their own personal experiences of dealing with the rollercoaster that is the post party in period be it through their own journeys as mothers or their experience of caring for others. The emphasis is definitely on accepting your own need as a new mother to trust your instincts and be kind to yourself more than anything else and that’s such a refreshing message compared to other books and websites we are often subject to.

As well as frank & friendly advice, the book contains easy to read and go handy recipe and top tip pages which I will no doubt be turning to as and when the need arises once baby boy is here. The chicken noodle soup recipe looks delicious so I might even try it beforehand!

The Little Book of Self Care for new mums  highlights the lacking in care provided to new Mum’s in my own local area when it talks about what you can expect from midwife appointments after having your baby, however this time around I feel like I’d be more prepared and empowered to question if I felt that they had missed something or if I felt I needed something more than just a quick chat. Plus, having this little guide in my armoury on the days when things are feeling a bit overwhelming or I feel unsure about something will help no end.

I’d thoroughly recommend this book to any expecting Mama, first time or otherwise, as at a time when your world feels like it’s been tipped on its side we could all do with a little empowerment and reminder that you matter too. It’s available on Amazon here* for £8.27 and would make a beautiful baby shower gift!

*This post contains affiliate links.

I was sent this book for the purpose of this review. All words and opinions are my own.

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For me, there is nothing more magical, more heart warming than watching my baby grow and learn each and every day. Over the last few weeks, Florence has transformed from a baby to a little cheeky, clever almost toddler full of character. She learned to clap her hands a few weeks ago and ever since, one of her favourite things to do is clap along to ‘If you’re happy and you know it’. She laughs and claps her hands so vigorously some times that she looses her balance! She’s happy, she knows it and she really wants to show it so she does.  I find myself singing it on repeat, so much so that I now hum it in the shower, whistle it while I’m cooking and it plays in my head every night before I go to sleep. While it’s getting a bit old now, it has made me think a little bit.

For a very long time all I ever wanted to be was a mother. That need to have a baby consumed my every thought, influenced every decision I made and for a while it made me a little crazy. When I found out I was pregnant in September 2016, I could barely contain my joy but at the same time I was so very nervous. I spent my pregnancy monitoring every little symptom, every little movement and worrying about literally every little thing. That joy and excitement at growing a tiny human was also combined with a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach and a tightening in my chest at the thought of it all going wrong. What if she couldn’t stay?

And then in May of last year, my beautiful healthy baby girl was born on her due date and filled my little world with light and a love like nothing else. Words cannot describe that feeling of elation I felt. Since Florence’s birth, people have commented so many times on how happy I seem. And they’re right. I am so happy I could burst! I look at photographs of myself taken over the last 9 months and for the first time since I was very young, I am actually smiling. From ear to ear, teeth showing, happy eyes. I think it is fair to say that my instagram feed, and my posts on here reflect that. 

The thing is though, not everyone who comments on my happiness does so in a ‘I’m so happy for you’ kind of way. More often than I can count it’s been said with spite, anger even. And that hurts. Especially when it comes from friends. Recently it’s made me question every single thing I say in person or online and made me feel as though I should be apologetic for feeling and being happy. For a while there I stopped clapping.

Of course, there are some bloody hard days here. Motherhood, life in fact, is filled with all sorts of trials and obstacles and while I know it is important to acknowledge both the highs and the lows, since becoming a Mum I just find myself feeling grateful for being able to have any of it! High or low. Sure, some days can be tough, I HATE putting my daughter down to sleep at night, I am constantly worrying that one of us will fall gravely ill and there have been weeks so far this year when I wondered if we’d ever make ends meet but I am grateful for very sleepless night, every really hard day because there are parents out there who would kill for one last sleepless night, or ‘tough’ day  with their babies. Moaning constantly or dwelling on the slightly crappier bits when I am so blessed to have what I have just seems insensitive, like an insult. I am so incredibly lucky and to not appreciate that would be stupid.

So I’ve decided, with a little help from my gorgeous little girl, that I am going to stop apologising for being happy. I’m not going to try and hide it in case it offends somebody. I am happy, and I know it, and I’m going to clap my hands.

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